Becoming a mom is probably the best thing I've ever done in my life. It's so cliche to say but my daughter is my greatest accomplishment. She's so smart and at times too smart for her own good. She's a funny, crazy, outgoing 2 year old going on 16. That being said, we are in our terrible 2's which I'm told doesn't go away for a few years, which then makes me want to stock up on wine. Anyway it's been a struggle for us because she is very stubborn (no idea where she gets it from :) ) her favorite word is no, and favorite phrase is "no mama not nice" (let us pray). The tantrums start from 6am till whenever she closes her eyes. Now instead of crying, wasting mascara and make up while sitting in a corner drinking wine, which I'm sure isn't healthy, I'd like to make fun of the situation and let those with or with out children know what all of us moms are really thinking when tantrums ensue. So I'm going to bring you through a typical day with my princess :)
5:30am - ::yawn, stretch:: why am I awake this early my alarm doesn't go off till 6:15am, let me check to see if shes awake yet, (looks on monitor because i don't dare step foot into her room unless i absolutely have to.) Damn shes awake, well shes moving her legs, shes not screaming for me yet let me try to catch a few more mins of beauty sleep (must needed)
5:55am - MAMA!............................ ok i'm awake, lets see if she calls me again.
6:00am - MAMA!!!!!!....ok ok im awake, (turns off alarms, rolls outta bed, walks into her room) "mama i poop, big one" oh lovely. While changing her pull up i ask if she wants to sit on the potty, how dare i! i get a NO 95% of the time, the other 5% she'll sit on the potty for 15-20mins and do nothing. We now need to get dressed for school, I can not pick out her clothes because at the mature age of 2 1/2 she is a ever growing fashionista.......If i pick out clothes a war happens so i try to just guide her towards choices that match, i can't say this always happens.
6:20am - now we fight over breakfast! I love the mornings she wants to eat egg, pork roll, toast, cereal, yogurt......but that happens as much as the times she tells me she wants to go onto the potty. We fight because i know its crazy but we don't eat candy for breakfast, or chips, or 3 pounds of cheese...so we fight i'm told no No NO NO NO NO NO NOOOOOOO for a good 20 mins till i get her to agree on donuts, they're a breakfast food right? Some days she doesn't even agree on that and i give into the chips or candy, because they're technically potatoes and some candy has peanuts so ehhh its ok right? Kids gotta eat ( now keep in mind i was a mom who was all about home made food, healthy choices, no candy (i will not bribe my kid with candy) no sugary juices....now i'm just happy shes eating something. If you're a mom who says you wont do this, trust me you will!!! for the sake of your sanity)
7:00am - ahhh coffee....::takes sip of warm coffee:: - that will be the only sip of warm coffee i get all morning........now i can start getting ready for work, yes i work i don't have the pleasure of being a stay at home mom nor would i want it, id loose my mind. HAHAHA just kidding I can't start to get ready yet, cause now we're screaming because the dog is looking at her the cat is not sitting on her lap, mickey is not on tv, she pooped her pants again, a small one this time, she wants to play with playdough, the dogs looking at her again, she wants my lip stick, she wants my mascara, she wants her tablet that's dead, she wants to brush her teach, the dogs looking at her again, she wants to brush her teach again, now she wants eggs, now she wants water, the cat needs to be fed, the dogs looking at her again.......andddd my coffee might as well be iced coffee.
7:30am - lets try this again, i begin to get ready, then I'm yelled at that she needs her make up. I ask her to go sit down watch some TV, i get told I'm not nice, we cry for a few mins, by the time that tantrum is over I'm now ready to walk out the door.
8:15am - ha! did you think we were just going to peacefully get out the door and get on with our day? Now we go to war about putting on socks and shoes. She tells me "no mama not yet, not nice" then its not the right pair of socks, then she can do it herself, then she needs me to do it, then those aren't the right shoes. ok these shoes are cool ok lets go, NOPE 'not this pair mama'...3 pairs later....ok jacket time! oh not that jacket? no this one isnt good either? ohhhhh you wanna wear the 'jacket' which is really a hoodie from 6 months ago that you no longer fit in and its 5 degrees outside..........a fight over a jacket ensues........
840am : mind you i need to be at work by 9am......we are finally walking out the door on our own or 80% of the time kicking screaming and hitting me, sometimes she tells me no!! cause she needs to go to the foodstore, back to bed, to watch tv, to go to grandmoms, to go back inside and get a toy she hasn't played with for 6 months.
8:55am : i still need to be at work by 9am............we pull out of the drive way get to school, on a good day she gets out peacefully and even walks in on her own...on an ok day she needs me to carry her in and i just hold my breath and pray it doesnt turn into a bad day where she does nothing but scream from the parking lot all the way into her class room.......
9:15am - guess I'm not making it on time, we'll try again tomorrow. I sit in the schools parking lot for 5-10mins just to breath and pray for some of my sanity to be restore. Now its of to work for 8 hours and again i pray i don't get the call that shes suddenly running a fever. (this happens more then you would ever think it should, day care is basically paying for your child to get sick and then get you sick )
4:00 - 5:00pm - the car ride to the day care after work is the only 10 mins of peace ill have until i get back home to take care of the zoo.
5:30pm - mommy is starting dinner! but she has other plans in mind, she wants to eat everything but dinner and this is where i resort back to the thinking i do with breakfast, as long as shes eating right?
6:00pm - dinner time! time for all of us to sit down to a peaceful relaxing dinner after a long day.....HA! the dogs looking at her, she doesn't like this, mama i need water, mama i need a fork (we're eating soup), mama i need a spoon (we're eating hamburgers), mama i need juice, dogs looking at her again, mickey is on tv lets dance, a commercial comes on lets have a breakdown....mama I'm done....My food is now the same temperature i drink my coffee at.....
7:00pm - this is when the war of bedtime starts, she doesn't wanna lay in her bed, she doesn't wanna go upstairs, she needs a bottle, she wants to color, she wants me to lay in her tent with her, lay with her on her Minnie Mouse couch, she needs a baby bottle, do her nails, the dogs looking at her, tells me i'm mean and to get out, slams door in my face, cries cause she now cant get the door open, she needs her blankie that is 2 inches away from her, she pooped 'a big one mama', we try to sit on potty, now we want to shower; not take a bath but shower, one more bottle...... I'm convinced at this point that if i just let her do all of this as quick as possible she tries herself out and I'm lucky she falls asleep before 8:00pm
9:00pm - I'm never that lucky, at this point she is now in her room or mine watching tv, again i was a mom that was like oh my child will never watch tv to fall asleep, she'll never have a tablet, we're gonna read books! HA! the books get thrown at me and i get hit with bottles.
10:00pm - by now shes usually asleep and i can then breathe for 5 mins before i pass out and start all over again the next morning :)
This is pretty much my life in a nut shell, but this little girl is my best friend and i wouldn't have it any other way!
Mom's and Dad's! share your toddler stories! lets all have a good laugh at the crazy lives we live!
I've always have had a love for lip color! I would always gravitate towards Mac but recently I have started buying lip color out side of my comfort zone. Recently I tried Kat Von D, Ever Lasting Liquid Lip and fell in LOVE! These matte lipsticks are pay far the best matte lipstick I've ever tried! They don't wear off, they don't dry out your lips and they look beautiful all day long! Other matte lip colors dry out my lips and start to clump up and just look gross after a few hours, which then tempts me to start biting at the dry skin on my lips and well its not pretty. These are definitely worth the money! ($20.00)
color left to right - Noble : Bow N Arrow : Ophleia : Sanctuary : Ludwig
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